I FEEL LESS PASSION

FOR MY PARTNER (or vice versa) 

If you can't create or maintain the SECURE and PASSIONATE RELATIONSHIPS you desire, you need to know, It's NOT YOU—It's Your Technique! We can CHANGE YOUR LOVE LIFE! You are not alone!

SO, DON'T STOP NOW! Keep reading.

Alisa Goodwin Snell, M.A. and the Lasting Love Academy have helped thousands of singles, just like you, to date more, create lasting love, and get married.

As you learn about how Anxious and Avoidant Attachment Patterns are affecting your relationships and what you can do about ityou will feel hopeful, validated, and empowered. Because we want you to be able to resolve these issues immediately, we've included RED LINKS that will give you INSTANT access to the techniques and skills you need to transform your dating and relationship challenges. 

SO, DON'T STOP NOW!

Keep reading. There is so much to learn, and we've included a special LOVE-CHANGING OFFER just for YOU! We'll get to that later. Let's FIRST find out what's holding you back from attracting the people you want. Follow the 3 STEPS below, and you'll be all set for Lasting Love!

You can OVERCOME YOUR CONCERNS and feel the CONFIDENCE and PASSION YOU CRAVE!

LET'S GET STARTED!

DISCOVER

if you act ANXIOUS or AVOIDANT in relationships and how you can transform these patterns into SECURE and PASSIONATE ATTACHMENTS.

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the SPECIAL OFFER and RIGHT PACKAGE to meet your needs and commitment to Lasting Love.

START TODAY

with the LOVE-CHANGING TECHNIQUES you need. They are NOW only a click away when you use the RED LINKS below.

 

DISCOVER

if you act ANXIOUS, AVOIDANT, or SECURE in your relationships

WHY WE CAN'T COMMIT

Difficulties with commitment, concerns over attraction, and unrelenting relationship doubts (in otherwise healthy relationships), is incredibly common.

CLICK THE VIDEO BOX below to LISTEN TO our MOST POPULAR podcast, Why We Can't Commit, as aired on the blog of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

AND DON'T STOP NOW! Keep reading!

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Want to TALK about YOUR SITUATION?

Schedule a

Don't wait any longer. Beyond expectations!

"Alisa put me at ease instantly, despite my fears. Warm, genuine, empathetic, insightful and experienced... The abundance of materials she makes available, her kindness, and the time she spends make every penny worth it". — SO GRATEFUL! — C.F.  READ MORE REVIEWS

 

DO YOU ACT ANXIOUS OR AVOIDANT? 

DON'T STOP NOW!

Take the following SELF-TESTS to DISCOVER if you have HIDDEN ATTACHMENT ISSUES. 

 

ANXIOUS ATTACHMENT (self-test)

  • Do you worry about whether you can get or keep this relationship? Yes / No
  • Do you doubt your partner's interest in you? Yes / No
  • Do you frequently analyze what your partner is doing, saying, texting, or Facebooking about for hidden messages and meaning? Yes / No
  • Do you become anxious and assume the worst when you don't hear from your partner immediately? Yes / No
  • Do you worry you are not a priority and frequently feel hurt by your partner's behaviors, choices, time with others, and hobbies? Yes / No
  • Does your mood revolve around what your partner is doing and saying? Yes / No
  • Do you frequently fear that your partner will lose interest in you, cheat on you, or break up with you? Yes / No
  • Do you feel a strong attraction and need for the relationship? Yes / No
  • Do you feel preoccupied with where the relationship is going or frequently talk about commitment? Yes / No
  • Do you worry your partner is more attractive, desirable, special, or unique than most people; thus, you can't afford to lose them? Yes / No

If you answered yes to two or more of these questions, then you may feel moderately anxious in the relationships. If you answered yes to four or more, you probably have an anxious (rather than secure) attachment to your partner. This may be due to their behaviors in the relationship or because you have an underlying pattern of feeling and acting this way in many relationships. You may feel a strong attraction and desire for the other person, but this attachment is an insecure one. You may need and depend on the other's love, validation, and attention to feel okay about yourself. You may be consumed by what the other thinks, how they feel, and what they're doing or saying. This creates cycling dependence on your partner as a way of managing your anxiety and insecurities. Your partner's passiveness, undoubtedly, reinforces your fears and insecurities, making it difficult to stop this pattern.

The Lasting Love Academy can help you break this cycle, both independently and as a couple. You will learn how to confront your fears and anxietiesdevelop a secure foundationmake peace with your imperfectionsact with more confidence, and get more commitment and affection from your partner. 

You are meant to love and be loved and can obtain the commitment and investment you desire from others.

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INSPIRING!

"Alisa helped me to [assert my needs and feelings] in a way that appeared confident and attractive (rather than desperate and needy), and in return, I got more respect, attention, and commitment". — Karen, Chicago  READ MORE REVIEWS

 

AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT (self-test)

  • Do you question whether you want your relationship? Yes / No
  • Do you feel numb, stuck, frozen, or indifferent when with your partner? Yes / No
  • Do you feel you're going through the motions in your relationship but not feeling the emotions you should feel for a partner? Yes / No
  • Do you passively react in your relationships rather than actively participating? Yes / No
  • Do you struggle to feel attraction for your partner? Yes / No
  • Do you fear settling, missing out on something better, or getting trapped in the wrong relationship? Yes / No
  • Do you find yourself thinking about your ex or comparing your partner to others? Yes / No
  • Do you struggle to enjoy the moment and just relax because your partner might assume you're more into them than you are, or they may expect more commitment afterward? Yes / No
  • Is it hard to consistently feel excited about your partner (sometimes you think they're amazing and other times you only see their flaws), making it difficult for you to trust your feelings? Yes / No
  • Do you have a strong need for alone time and feel indifferent about when you'll see your partner again? Yes / No
  • Do you often engage in the relationship out of duty, obligation, or fear? Yes / No
  • Do you say yes when you want to say no, hold grudges (that your partner doesn't know about), hint to but deny your anger, or use sarcasm to express how you really feel? Yes / No
  • Does your partner have to pressure you before you'll open up, be vulnerable, or share your feelings and needs? Yes / No
  • Do you tend to be passive about planning dates, seeking time with your partner, doing things for them, or having difficult conversations? Yes / No
  • Does the idea of breaking up seem like a relief? Yes / No
  • Do you struggle with a strong desire to flee or end the relationship (even though you know your partner is foundationally good)? Yes / No
  • Do you feel more excited and attracted to those you can't date or keep relationships with while feeling indifferent about the people you can? Yes / No
  • Do you feel preoccupied with the need to feel excited and passionate about someone (because you feel only then you'll really want to work at a relationship)? Yes / No

If you answered yes to three or more of these questions, then you probably feel shame to admit these feelings but relieved to know you're not the only one. If you answered yes to five or more, you might have convinced yourself that the problem isn't you. It's either the relationship or your partner—if they were more attractive, compatible, smart, educated, fun, healthy, active, religious, social, outgoing, happy, confident, positive, etc., you wouldn't struggle to commit. You fear to set or become trapped in the wrong relationship and believe that if it doesn't feel natural, organic, or easy, it can't be right. You long to feel a strong and powerful connection (like you've felt when anxiously attached in the past), but even when initially excited, your feelings often fade within weeks or months. Although you recognize that there is a pattern to your disconnection with others, you believe there has to be a partner who wouldn't trigger these issues.

The Lasting Love Academy will explain what's driving your disconnection and irritation in relationships. Once you know what to do, you will feel more passionexperience less pressure, and have more fun. Making decisions will become easier. Increasing commitment and deepening your connection will feel less stressful, and your capacity to enjoy lasting love will grow step-by-step.

Lasting and passionate love is not something some people find and others don't. You can have the skills you need to succeed.

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RELATIONSHIP BREAK THROUGH FOR ME!

"After 10 years of relationships that all seemed to fizzle at 4-5 months. I felt like I was lying to myself to say it was just because "it wasn't right," so I spent a lot of time and money on counselors/coaches and was still unsatisfied with the vague solutions they offered. After one visit to Alisa, I had more insight into what I needed to change than all the others combined. Now I'm in a long-term relationship. it's miraculously still going strong". E.S.   READ MORE REVIEWS

 

4 REASONS YOU FEEL ANXIOUS OR AVOIDANT

1. Anxiety

Singles often struggle to accept anxiety as playing a significant role in their dating or relationship issues. This underlying force can push some singles toward perfection and success in their religious worship, educational goals, and career choices, while also unwittingly make them act needy, intense, critical, or unreachable in dating. It can cause them to overanalyze every decision, emotion, and action they or their partners take in relationships (signs of an anxious attachment), or it can make them feel passive, disengaged, indifferent, and numb (signs of an avoidant attachment). It can drive them to over-focus on getting and keeping a relationship (anxious attachment), or it can cause them to be plagued with doubts about whether they want the relationship (avoidant attachment).

Due to singles believing that their need for commitment is understandable or their fears of incompatibility are reasonable, they often don't see anxiety as being the true source of their problems. For instance, those with avoidant attachment often perseverate on their partner's small flaws (slightly unattractive features, or minor incompatibilities) fearing that these may lead to future problems, when the issue may actually be a sign that they're suffering from a specific type of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, called Relationship OCD (or ROCD).

The Lasting Love Academy will help you understand the underlying influence of anxiety in propelling both sides of this insecure attachment cycle and what actions you can take to resolve it. You can learn to break these patterns and create secure attachments through being Available, Responsive, and emotionally Engaged (A.R.E.) with each other. 

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IT REALLY WORKS! 

"Alisa is amazing! She gives you homework, follows up, and cares. That's exactly why I'm in the relationship I am today, and with a more secure attachment than I could have dreamed of".  — A.B.  READ MORE REVIEWS

2. Common thinking errors

Thinking errors are quite pervasive in our society and can have a big impact on attachment.

  • all-or-nothing thinking (using "always," "never," or absolutes while failing to see important exceptions)
  • what if (ruminating over past choices or possible catastrophic outcomes)
  • comparison trap (validating or invalidating one's worth, a partner, or your relationship through comparison rather than self-determination)
  • personalization (believing one's partner is a good or bad reflection on oneself)
  • perfectionism (believing personal and relationship perfection is the solution to avoiding unhappiness)
  • emotional reasoning (believing that every emotion or thought is potentially important and should be given attention)
  • mental filter (focusing on one thing until it obscures the bigger picture)
  • "should" statements (shaming oneself or others as a means of motivation)

Thinking errors like these increase anxiety, drive insecurity, and create disconnections.

The Lasting Love Academy will help confront your thinking errors and fearsfeel and act more secureenjoy your relationship, and experience more passion.  

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FEAR OF MISSING OUT

"My boyfriend was a great guy, but I still felt attracted to other men and worried I might find someone better. Alisa helped me to recognize the fears and thinking errors that were haunting me and gave me the skills to confront and resolve them. I didn't feel pressure, just support and clarity. Now I'm engaged!— K.P. in D.C.  READ MORE SUCCESS STORIES

3. Pressure 

Whether pressure is created internally or felt externally from others, it usually amplifies the fears of the anxiously attached and shuts down the emotions of the avoidantly attached.

For example, when an anxiously attached person feels pressure to marry (either due to their fears, concerns over the length of the relationship, or questions from others), they often experience more doubt and insecurity about their partner's feelings. This can lead to a strong need for their partner's increased validation, love, or commitment.

However, when an avoidant person feels cornered with questions about their feelings, they may instantly feel less connected without knowing why. From this pressured position, they usually aren't capable of experiencing an authentic positive emotion or respond with excitement about becoming more committed. It doesn't mean they don't feel positive emotions at other times, but when under the influence of pressure, their ability to feel positive emotions is restricted. 

The Lasting Love Academy will explain the paradox of authenticity, which drives much of the pressure the avoidantly attached feel and how both partners can overcome it

In truth, emotions are fairly random and prone to fluctuation. The Lasting Love Academy will help you create and maintain the feelings you desire based on your values.  

You will learn how to take take the pressure off (individually and as a couple), understand each others' positive and negative emotions, and enjoy the stage you're in (rather than rushing to later stages of relationships). This will make it easier for you both to create a strong bondsecure attachment, and deep connection. You will free yourself from society's unrealistic emotional standards.

Fortunately, lasting love is a choice and skill that you can develop!

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MARRIED WITH CHILDREN

"I was 37-years old, never married, and unable to commit to my girlfriend of two years. Then I heard a podcast Alisa did on "Why We Can't Commit." I reached out and immediately felt at home with her. She guided me through a respectful decision-making process, and instead of pressuring me, she focused on skill development for both moving forward and breaking up. I am now happily married with kids, and I haven't looked back since. Her advice was life-changing and empowering".  NO REGRETS — Jeremy  READ MORE SUCCESS STORIES

4. SITUATIONAL TRIGGERS AND CORE FEARS

It is common for singles to experience negative reactions to their date's driving habits, beliefs, personal issues, or physical flaws (to name a few), but these issues are often not the reason for their reactions. They are more likely responding to a personal core fear that was triggered by the situation. For example, their frustration with a partner being frequently late may be more about the fear of being powerless, embarrassed, taken for granted, or mistreated than it is about the other's tardiness.

The Lasting Love Academy will help you reveal you and your partner's underlying fears so you can address them with empathy and confidence together. You will learn how to respond to conflict in a way that keeps you Available, Responsive, and emotionally Engaged (A.R.E.) in your relationships. As they learn to solve problems together, your confidence will grow in both your partner and the relationship. You will share feelings and meet each other's deeper needs. Your frustrations and situational triggers will decrease, and the idea of living a lifetime together will bring joy

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LIFE SAVER FOR MY SON!

"I originally bought your book for my daughters, but your words of wisdom were a 'tender mercy' for my son, at a very difficult time in his life. It's hard to break free from the effect of a manipulative relationship. Your book was a life saver". From one mother to another, thanks! — Joan (California)  READ MORE SUCCESS STORIES

Strategy Sessions with Alisa Goodwin Snell, M.A

Alisa spent decades as a Marriage and Family Therapist and became the Nation's #1 Dating and Relationship Strategist. She's the author of 7 books for singles and the creator of the wildly successful Lasting Love Academy courses. Her expertise and strategies have resulted in THOUSANDS of SINGLES dating more, finding love, and getting married! But don't take our word for it. Discover What Others Are Saying and read Customer Reviews,

In all of Alisa's experience, she's never found someone’s situation so hopeless that they couldn’t be helped by the unique techniques she teaches.

You don't have to navigate your dating and relationship challenges alone! Alisa's got you covered. The skills you need are within her reach, and she can help you overcome every challenge in your way.

After doing a thorough assessment of your history, attachment patterns, fears, and needs, Alisa will expertly craft a Lasting Love Action Plan to fit your unique situation, complete with ongoing strategy sessions, problem-solving, and support during your Lasting Love Journey. Singles achieve greater success, confidence, and results when they have the support they need through every stage of the process.

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YOU, YOUR HAPPINESS, and a LIFETIME OF LOVE are worth the investment!

Nothing else will have as great of an impact as experiencing LASTING LOVE for YOU and YOUR FAMILY. But don't take our word for it. Discover What Others Are Saying and read Customer Reviews

30-Day Money-Back Guarantee

With our 30-Day Money-Back Guarantee

YOU HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE — BUT LOVE! 

 

CHOOSE A SPECIAL OFFER

TO MATCH YOUR NEEDS AND COMMITMENT TO LASTING LOVE.

ALL of the SPECIAL OFFERS below include ACCESS to the LASTING LOVE ACADEMY as well as TWO or more PERSONALIZED STRATEGY SESSIONS WITH ALISA

These packages offer MORE THAN $400 OF SAVINGS, but the BEST SAVINGS are available for those who are ALL-IN. Being ALL-IN gives you up to NINE HOURS with Alisa and over $1700 IN SAVINGS!

SO, LET'S GET YOU STARTED on the LIFE and LOVE CHANGING SKILLS you need!

These limited-time savings won't last long. So take action today!

Discover What Others Are Saying, read Raving Reviews, and check out our FAQs

2 Pricing Options

$54/M or $497

FOR RELATIONSHIPS 

Includes the Lasting Love Academy and ONE Strategy Sessions

Valued at $946

A limited-time savings of up to $449.

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I'M READY TO START TODAY!

2 Pricing Options

$97/M or $897

FOR DATING & RELATIONSHIPS

Includes the Lasting Love Academy and TWO Strategy Sessions

Valued at $1,962

A limited-time savings of up to $1,065.

Click for details.

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For Dating, Relationships, & Support

$1497

MOST 

COMPREHENSIVE

Includes the Lasting Love Academy and up to 9 HOURS of Strategy Sessions

Valued at $3,262

A limited-time SAVINGS of $1,765

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Not sure what's right for you? 

VIEW & COMPARE ALL OUR PACKAGES

DON'T STOP NOW! 

It's time to LAUNCH your Lasting Love Journey in Step 3!

NOW THAT YOU'VE JOINED THE LASTING LOVE ACADEMY

 IT'S TIME TO

START TODAY!

 

We are so excited to JOIN YOU in YOUR LASTING-LOVE JOURNEY 

 

First

Let's get your Personalized Lasting Love Action Plan started so you can get the support and guidance you need to succeed, ALL of the Lasting Love Packages include STRATEGY SESSIONS with The Nation's #1 Dating & Relationship Strategist, Alisa Goodwin Snell M.A. Take a quick moment to SCHEDULE Your Intake Assessment with her. Choose a phone call or live session at our Salt Lake City office.

SCHEDULE WITH ALISA NOW!

Second

GET STARTED TODAY by diving into the Lasting Love Academy materials. LOGIN NOW!

Third

USE THE RED LINKS ABOVE (in the 10 Reasons You're Not Dating the People You Want—ALL OF WHICH should work now) to meet your immediate needs. The Lasting Love Academy is comprehensive, and as such, it can be overwhelming at first. Using the links on this page will help you find the most immediately relevant topics to fit your needs. You may also access these 10 Reasons within the Lasting Love Academy under the Stage 1: Dating Skills Course: 10 Reasons You're Not Dating the People You Want

Fourth

When you meet with Alisa, she will give you specific goals and feedback to jumpstart your Lasting Love Journey. But you may also text her at 801-447-6000 or email her at [email protected]

 

You can do this! We've got your back! Lasting Love is within your reach! 

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